Tobias and his crazy ways

Wow, time is flying by and we just had an amazing Thanksgiving with Bing & Debbie! Such a blessing having them here and we had the best time just being together. Toby is getting bigger and more amazing every day. Walking, running and getting into all sorts of mischief, he is a fun little man. This is a little video we just shot of his new way of saying "mama". So hilarious!

Tobias says "mama" like a little man from Kendra Rohl on Vimeo.

Tobias is such a goof ball!

This is a little video of Tobias waking up from his nap and me sneaking in to scare him, he thinks it's hilarious :)
In other news, Toby has one other top tooth fully out and 3 others about to poke through. His current favorite thing to do is push his stroller or a shopping cart or any other thing with wheels around and my challenge is to try and direct him so he doesn't run into everything!

Lots of fun these days!

Toby likes to be startled - cracks him up! from Kendra Rohl on Vimeo.

Toby is walking!

Well, it's official, my little baby is not so little anymore and he is walking all over the place! It's amazing to me how just a week ago he could only take a few steps and now he walks all around the house by himself. This is a video I took a couple days ago of him strolling around and he also does his dog sound and his "oh man" as a special bonus. More videos and pictures from our trip to the lake to come!

love you all

Untitled from Kendra Rohl on Vimeo.

Toby's 1 yr old!

Here is a little video from the Tobster's 1st bday party. He didn't really know what to do with the cupcake at first but he managed to get into it and enjoyed it quite a bit. In the video you can also hear him say Mama which of course is one of my favorite new things he is doing :)

Toby turns 1 - my how time flies from Kendra Rohl on Vimeo.

Growing up so fast

Wow, so many new things since I last posted! We went to Oregon to visit our amazing family and had such a wonderful time. I will be posting all the pics from our trip on Flickr so check back for those!

Toby now has 2 teeth on the bottom and is starting to take steps independently which means walking is just around the corner and I will officially be the proud mom of a toddler. Hard to believe he is 1 year old already, time sure does fly! He is very into all things musical which of course we are sooo excited about. He dances when music comes on, his favorite toys are musical instruments and he sings every sunday during worship. the video posted here is of him playing the guitar. It's over a month old but still so fun to see how he really tries to make the strumming sound instead of just slamming on it. I think he shows real promise in his guitar playing!

In other fun news, cousin Caroline has moved in and we love having her here! We have been having such an amazing time with her and the Lord is doing incredible things in her life, it's truly a privilege to be a part of it all. She and Toby have become fast friends and she can really get him cracking up (video of that to come soon).

All in all, things are going amazingly well at the Rohl casa and we feel blessed beyond words and so grateful to the Lord for all that we have in our life right now.

Tobias loves to play the guitar from Kendra Rohl on Vimeo.

Basketball & Manhood

Maybe I am getting old, maybe I have lost a step or two, but why is it that the pickup basketball court today has become the proving ground for manhood. I remember growing up, playing some very heated games of basketball, lots of verbal shots were being fired and maybe a hard screen was thrown now and again. But today and maybe the last few times I have played I have lost a love for the game. Today for example: first time in about a year I have stepped foot in the gym to play with people outside my childhood friends. I got there shot around a bit, made my free throw and ran the first game. First and last. I was on a team with people I know, have played with before, and some I haven't, we lost 8-11. I got the ball once in the flow of the offense, and you know what I did with it? I clanked it off the rim with a difficult shot that I shouldn't have taken but did because that was the one and only time I was going to see the ball on offense. I know basketball, I understand the flow of the game and probably set more screens, make more slashing cuts, and box out more then any pick up player out there. But I am not here to whine about not getting the ball or loosing the game.

This was the disconnect I saw tonight. I don't understand why the guys playing need to use the game to make known how masculine, tough, and dominating they are. Prime example: big guy one goes into the lane for a lay-up, takes a tap to the nose as the defender makes a good play on the ball. Without his Fisher-esk flop the foul wouldn't have been called. But instead of taking it up top he comes right at the guy and pushes him, as if to say "you just threatened my livelihood, called my mom a gerbil, and kicked my kid in the face, now I must break you". Listen I understand competition, the heat of the moment, but really? You got tapped on the nose, sack up hulk, it's just a game! In fact just a game that is being played by other desk jockeys, white collar, blue collar, and unemployed 30+ men. Last time I checked there were no scouts from the Suns or even the Mercury for that matter sitting in the stands, hell the only people sitting in the stands are the losers who couldn't make a free throw to get into the first game.

The court has become the only outlet some of these guys have to show that they are in-fact, men. And that is sad, maybe they are getting shut down at work, or at home, emasculated in some way in the outside world so they need to show the true size of their junk to a group of guys who are otherwise there to have a good time. I know that in that group of guys I played with tonight it's about 50-50. 50% hot heads and 50% guys who want to run up and down a court, dribble a little, take a shot or ten, and go home and ice the ol' bones. I know I used to be over competitive, and under talented in my younger years but I have traded that for a bit of maturity and a true desire to just get some run in and most of all have some fun. I realize now what my father must have been trying to tell me for so many years out there on the court and, I get it now. Manhood doesn't show itself in my stature, in my ability to make others do what I will them to do, not even in how strong I am. It's sad because these 50+% of men represented on that court tonight still need that. They still need to dominate to feel strong, to intimidate to feel powerful and to "score" the most in life to feel appreciated. I guess I see through those lies now, tonight out on the basketball court. I didn't want to hang around for the second game not because i would sit out for 20 or so minutes and my legs would stiffen up, or that the next game would be much like the first where I was a inbounder and screen setter, I just didn't want to test anyones manhood.

Here is a quote that caught my eye from an unlikely source (based on my great disdain for the patriots) :

"Why do I have three Super Bowl rings and still think there's something greater out there for me? I mean, maybe a lot of people would say, 'Hey man, this is what is.' I reached my goal, my dream, my life. Me, I think, 'God, it's got to be more than this.' I mean this isn't, this can't be what it's all cracked up to be." When Kroft asked him, "What's the answer?" Brady responded, "I wish I knew. I wish I knew. I love playing football and I love being quarterback for this team. But at the same time, I think there are a lot of other parts about me that I'm trying to find."
Tom Brady interview with Steve Kroft, 60 Minutes

As much as I don't like Tom Brady he has a point, there is more out there, more then our physical accomplishments, our status in the workplace. Something that my father has exemplified for my brother and I is that true since of Godly manhood; a strong powerful man that can pick up any would be harasser and put him in his place, that is gentle and kind in his authority and leadership. Why do guys, big strong masculine guys, listen to my father? Ironworkers on big jobs yield to his leadership even if he is the "new" guy on the job? Because of a genuine Godly masculinity that doesn't need the bravado and arrogance to speak for him. I think I understood the folly of my youth today, and I strive to be a better man. Like my father is, and like my God wants me to be.

Tobias feeds himself - in a way

Toby is pretty much ready to be done with baby food as far as the kind in the jar goes. He really prefers finger foods that he can feed himself so I'm now trying all sorts of different fruits, veggies and meats to see what he will eat. One way I have found to get him to eat the jar food that he isn't so crazy about is to help him to use the spoon to feed himself. He thinks it's quite hilarious for some reason :)

Tobias loves to feed himself from Kendra Rohl on Vimeo.

Tobias loves to dance!

This little video is of the Tobster doing his booty scoot dance. It's so stinking cute :) In other news, Toby popped out his first tooth! He didn't even show any signs of teething but all of a sudden one day there was a little top of the bottom right tooth poking out. I hope all his teeth come in this easy :)

is anyone reading this blog still by the way or were my posts to infrequent to retain any followers??
love you all
Kendra

Untitled from Kendra Rohl on Vimeo.

Tobias is sleeping through the night!

Hello world, yet again I have gone a month without posting, what is wrong with me? Wait, don't answer that :)
In Toby news, he is sleeping through the night! 10 - 12 hours straight, what a champ! Naptimes are easy too, just lay him down in the crib with his plug and he falls to sleep on his own. I really never thought we would get to this place but here we are, thank you Lord!

No teeth yet but the dr says that is good because the later the teeth come in the healthier so I'm fine with waiting. At his last visit he was in the 50% for weight and 95% for height meaning he is average weight for his age but above average height, Mark is soooo happy, he has big sports dreams Tobs!

Here is a video that was actually taken a few weeks back so of course he looks different now since he seems to change every day :) He had just woken up from a nap and set up the camera to see if I could catch him laughing when I come in to get him.

Tobias up from his nap - he likes to be startled from Kendra Rohl on Vimeo.

love you all!
Kendra

Fun in San Diego

We arrived in San Diego last Sunday and will leave tomorrow so it's been a nice long time in beautiful Cali with my family. Mark's work needed someone to work in San Diego for the week and since we have our family out here, it worked out great! Tobias has been loving his time with cousin Christopher and they are so cute together. He loves playing with their dogs (a huge golden retriever, bulldog and black lab) and my brother really knows how to make him crack up. It's been great to get out of the heat and see the ocean, makes me miss living in the beauty that is Cali but I'm ready to get back into life in Phoenix. Here is a little video of Grandma Sandra and Cousin Christopher making Toby laugh.

Mother's Day - a day of celebration indeed!

This Mother's Day was one filled with so many emotions for me and one that I will remember forever. Waking up to the sound of my son softly cooing in his crib and walking in to see his smiling face and tiny arms reaching up to me is something I love every morning but this day seemed exceptionally special. It still seems surreal that I'm a mama this Mother's Day when so many before this were so painful and empty. I think the years of waiting have made being a mom that much more amazing. I can honestly say that I love every single part of being a mama, the stinky nasty parts, the giggly snugly parts and everything in between, there is not a day that goes by that I don't thank God for the gift of our amazing son Tobias.

During worship today at church the Lord reminded me of a season I was in over a year ago that was very difficult and filled with searching questions and important answers. I remember during the prayer time after a sermon at church about worship and idolatry the Lord asked me a simple but incredibly stinging question "If I never blessed you with a baby, never allowed you to be a mom would you still worship me?" "Would you live your life as a joy set before you in full confidence that My plan for you is the best and if it would bring Me glory for you to be childless, would you live your life for Me with a heart overflowing with joy".

I wish I could say that I answered that question with an immediate and hearty "Yes Lord of course!" but that was not the case. I really had to search my heart and allow the Holy Spirit to reveal my true motivation for love, service and devotion to Jesus. Was I serving Him because I thought it would be in my best interest and that if I worked hard enough or prayed long enough He would give me what I wanted? Was I holding this unanswered prayer of a baby hostage to Him and saying "Lord, I need you to do this in order for me to fully love and serve you, if you don't give me a baby I just don't know where we will stand?" There were times when those questions were in my heart but by God's sufficient grace He finally allowed me to lay my request at His feet and leave it there, in full confidence that no matter what His answer was, He was in control and I would love, serve and follow Him joyfully no matter what. It was a pivotal shift in my view of God's sovereignty and grace and my response in worship and devotion to Him. I'm so grateful for that time of raw, wrestling, angry and difficult conversations with God because through them He was able to show me more of His glory and love than I thought possible.

Thanks be to God that His answer was YES and that shortly after I had let the "need" for a baby go into His hands He put a heart for adoption in Mark and I and within just a few short months we were holding our son. Jesus continues to write His story of redemption, grace and goodness all over our lives and I know that no matter what happens along this journey, He is my Savior, my first love and my all in all.

Thank you Lord for my son, for my husband, for this life of beauty so undeserved!

Toby is crawling!

click on this link to see the video of Toby on his first day of crawling. I need to take another one cause he is so stinkin fast now! Let the childproofing of the house begin!

http://vimeo.com/11516084

Not so much once a week I guess :)

okay, so clearly I'm not keeping up with my once a week post, best intentions but then life somehow seems to mess with all my well laid plans :)

Things are crazy good and crazy busy around here and Tobias is starting to crawl which is making life really interesting for me! It's now a fun game of what tiny particle of fluff or trash or stray button, hairtie, etc. can I find before he gets it into his mouth and he is really good at finding random stuff on the ground so I have to bring my "A" game every minute of the day.

We have been doing tons of photo shoots lately and really enjoying ourselves! You can check out the latest work in the Engagement & Wedding portion of the Indie Image collection on Flickr http://www.flickr.com/photos/mdrohl/collections/72157607019946711/
It's been so much fun shooting some of our favorite people and they sure do know how to work it in front of a camera which makes our job so much easier.

I've added some new pics of the Tobster too, he just got a little haircut and he looks even more grown up! how can it be? He is going to be 9 months old next week, oh how time flies.

Toby and I are headed to Tombstone & Bisbee tomorrow for a little sight seeing adventure with my Dad & Joan so that should be fun and I will be taking lots of pics of the wild west and will post them someday, better not commit to a time frame at the rate I'm going :)

love you all!

Toby on location

here are some pics of Tobias on location where we did some friends' engagement photos this saturday. He spent a good deal of time on the blanket just being silly and making people laugh. See the Flickr link for more pics :)

What a trooper!

I just have to say that our little boy is such a good sport about being dragged all around Phoenix for photo shoots and the like. This past weekend was packed from sun up to sun down and Tobias couldn't have been a more delightful little boy the whole time. He is truly a treat to be around and with each passing day he seems to get cuter and add some new dimension to his charming personality which just makes us fall more and more in love.

He is making great headway towards crawling which is exciting but means lots of work for me in baby-proofing our casa! Lots of new sounds every day and he is very intentional about them too, as if we should know exactly what he means. I think he is going to be an early talker if I had to make a guess.

Excited for cousin Caroline to get here tomorrow!!!!

I will write a post about our finalization of our adoption soon but feel like I need to give it a bit of time and attention so it may take me a few days :)

love you all!

Serious face silly boy

This is a video of Toby up past his bedtime, on grandma's watch of course :) His new thing is to give you a real serious look and then flashing a huge smile with real flirty eyes. We managed to capture a couple of his looks here but I will try to get a clearer video with our other camera. enjoy!

7 months already!

Well, I know it's been wayyyy to long but I'm finally writing a new post! I can't believe it's already been 7 months since we brought our little boy home, my how time flies! Tobias is growing so fast and it seems that he is doing something new every day! My goal is to post weekly about my life as a stay at home mom with lots of pics and even some videos! sheesh, I'm doubting myself even as a write these words but I'm going to make a go of it :)

I am LOVING being a mom, it is truly amazing and Mark and I are having the best time with Tobias. He is such a goof ball and has quite the sense of humor already. As soon as I can figure out how to post video I will load some up from the last few months so you can see how he has progressed and what he is up to today. He is eating like a champ, sitting up all by himself and playing with a wide assortment of toys and is really into anything that makes music. The sleeping is getting better, longer stretches and more consistent so thank the Lord for that! He says DaDa pretty much all the time and were pretty sure he knows what he is saying. he says MaMa when he cries in the middle of the night and it's just the cutest/sadest little thing. He laughs all the time, especially at the pups and Mark has quite the series of circus tricks that he does with him to get him going, not for the faint of heart though so when I post that video I will make sure to post a disclaimer for all the "nervous Nelly's" out there :) All in all he is practically perfect in every way and an absolute joy!

We go to our final court hearing this Wednesday to finalize the adoption and we are so excited. I guess it's a really lovely little ceremony to make everything official and I will have to write more about that experience later. For now, enjoy the new pics, they are from the last 3 months of the little man's life and there will be more to come, I promise :)

love you all,
Kendra